31 May 2012

2 Nephi 27: The Book of Mormon prophesies itself

After taking a short break from quoting Isaiah, Nephi got tired of his own tiresome words, so he went back to quoting Isaiah again.

But this time, it's not just filler.

Isaiah 29 was selected because it refers to a special book, sealed by God, that the wise and learned  cannot understand. Only one very special person will be able to read it.

As Nephi explains:
It shall come to pass that the Lord God shall bring forth unto you the words of a book ... And behold the book shall be sealed.  
But the book shall be delivered unto a man ... which are the words of those who have slumbered in the dust. 
The book shall be hid from the eyes of the world, that the eyes of none shall behold it save it be that three witnesses shall behold it ... and they shall testify to the truth of the book and the things therein.  
And wo be unto him that rejecteth the word of God! 2 Nephi 27:6-14
The book, of course, is the Book of Mormon, "a marvelous work and a wonder," and the very special person is Joseph Smith.

It's all there in Isaiah 29, as quoted by Nephi (with a few extra "and it came to passes" and "beholds" thrown in to make it sound even more biblical than the Bible).
But behold, it shall come to pass that the Lord God shall say unto him to whom he shall deliver the book: Take these words which are not sealed and deliver them to another, that he may show them unto the learned, saying: Read this, I pray thee. And the learned shall say: Bring hither the book, and I will read them. 2 Nephi 27:15
And the man shall say: I cannot bring the book, for it is sealed. Then shall the learned say: I cannot read it. 2 Nephi 27:17-18
(And the vision of all is become unto you as the words of a book that is sealed, which men deliver to one that is learned, saying, Read this, I pray thee: and he saith, I cannot; for it is sealed: Isaiah 29:11)  
Wherefore it shall come to pass, that the Lord God will deliver again the book and the words thereof to him that is not learned; and the man that is not learned shall say: I am not learned. 2 Nephi 27:19
(And the book is delivered to him that is not learned, saying, Read this, I pray thee: and he saith, I am not learned. Isaiah 29:12)
Therefore, I will proceed to do a marvelous work among this people, yea, a marvelous work and a wonder, for the wisdom of their wise and learned shall perish, and the understanding of their prudent shall be hid. 2 Nephi 27:26
(Therefore, behold, I will proceed to do a marvellous work among this people, even a marvellous work and a wonder: for the wisdom of their wise men shall perish, and the understanding of their prudent men shall be hid. Isaiah 29:14)
The book of Mormon prophesies itself -- 2400 years before it was dug up and translated by Joseph Smith.

When it comes to prophesy, you just can't beat the Book of Mormon!

30 May 2012

In my name they shall take up serpents

The last thing that Jesus supposedly said to his followers before beaming up to heaven after his resurrection was this:
And these signs shall follow them that believe; In my name shall they cast out devils; they shall speak with new tongues; They shall take up serpents; and if they drink any deadly thing, it shall not hurt them; they shall lay hands on the sick, and they shall recover. Mark 16:17-18
Jesus said there are five signs of true believers, and one of them is handling snakes -- and walking on them.
Behold, I give unto you power to tread on serpents and scorpions, and over all the power of the enemy: and nothing shall by any means hurt you. Luke 10:19
There just aren't many true believers anymore.

And now there is one less.

23 May 2012

So it was Jesus that sent the serpents to bite people for complaining!

One of the craziest stories in the Bible is found in Numbers 21. It all happens in just two verses:
The people spake against God, and against Moses, Wherefore have ye brought us up out of Egypt to die in the wilderness? for there is no bread, neither is there any water; and our soul loatheth this light bread.
And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died. Numbers 21:5-6
Christians don't pay much attention to it, though. That was, after all, the Old Testament, and they ignore pretty much everything in it, except for the verses that condemn homosexuality.

Sure, they say, God sent fiery serpents to bite the people for complaining about the lack of food and water, but Jesus had nothing to do with it.

Unless you believe Paul, that is.
Neither let us tempt Christ, as some of them also tempted, and were destroyed of serpents. 1 Corinthians 10:9
The people tempted Christ (by complaining) and he sent snakes to bite them.

So don't tempt Jesus, or he'll send some of his snakes to bite you too.

16 May 2012

2 Nephi 26: All those who have dwindled in unbelief shall not be forgotten.

Nephi tells us, once again, all about Jesus, 600 or so years before Jesus existed.

After Jesus dies he will rise from the dead and come visit the Nephites in North America. The Nephites will learn about his birth, death, and resurrection; then all hell will break loose. Proud and wicked Nephites will stone to death the Nephite saints and prophets, then God will cause the proud and the wicked to be swallowed by the earth, covered with mountains, carried away by whirlwinds, crushed by falling buildings, destroyed by thunder, lightening, earthquakes, and fire.
After Christ shall have risen from the dead he shall show himself unto you, my children.

Many generations shall pass away, and there shall be great wars and contentions among my people.

And after the Messiah shall come there shall be signs given unto my people of his birth, and also of his death and resurrection; and great and terrible shall that day be unto the wicked, for they shall perish; and they perish because they cast out the prophets, and the saints, and stone them, and slay them.

All those who are proud, and that do wickedly, the day that cometh shall burn them up, saith the Lord of Hosts.

They that kill the prophets, and the saints, the depths of the earth shall swallow them up, saith the Lord of Hosts; and mountains shall cover them, and whirlwinds shall carry them away, and buildings shall fall upon them and crush them to pieces and grind them to powder.

And they shall be visited with thunderings, and lightnings, and earthquakes, and all manner of destructions, for the fire of the anger of the Lord shall be kindled against them, and they shall be as stubble, and the day that cometh shall consume them, saith the Lord of Hosts. 2 Nephi 26:1-6
After the wicked kill the righteous and God kills the wicked, Jesus will heal whatever survivors there may be and there will be peace for three or four generations. Then the Nephites will "yield to the devil," be destroyed again, and "go down to hell."
But the Son of righteousness shall appear unto them; and he shall heal them, and they shall have peace with him, until three generations shall have passed away, and many of the fourth generation shall have passed away in righteousness.
And when these things have passed away a speedy destruction cometh unto my people ... they shall reap destruction; for because they yield unto the devil ... therefore they must go down to hell. 2 Nephi 26:9-10 
Sometime after the Nephites are destroyed, the Gentiles (Non-Mormon Protestants) will start believing that Jesus is the Christ.
It must needs be that the Gentiles be convinced also that Jesus is the Christ, the Eternal God. 2 Nephi 26:12
In the last days, after the Gentiles are converted, Nephi's seed will dwindle in unbelief and be smitten by the Gentiles. God will camp out against the dwindlers and "all those that dwindle in unbelief shall not be forgotten."
I prophesy unto you concerning the last days.
After my seed ... shall have dwindled in unbelief, and shall have been smitten by the Gentiles; yea, after the Lord God shall have camped against them round about ... all those who have dwindled in unbelief shall not be forgotten. 2 Nephi 26:14-15
Then, in the latter days of the last days, the truths in the Book of Mormon will be written, but those who dwindle in unbelief won't believe them because "they seek to destroy the things of God."
For thus saith the Lord God: They shall write the things which shall be done among them, and they shall be written and sealed up in a book, and those who have dwindled in unbelief shall not have them, for they seek to destroy the things of God. 2 Nephi 26:17
And it will come to pass that those who dwindle in unbelief will be smitten (again) by the Gentiles.
And it shall come to pass, that those who have dwindled in unbelief shall be smitten by the hand of the Gentiles. 2 Nephi 26:19
Then the Gentiles will stumble "because of the greatness of their stumbling block" by building evil churches according to the secret combinations of the devil (who founded all the non-LDS churches).
The Gentiles ... stumbled, because of the greatness of their stumbling block, that they have built up many churches ... which cause envyings, and strifes, and malice.
And there are also secret combinations ... according to the combinations of the devil, for he is the founder of all these things. 2 Nephi 26:20-22
Which leaves us with the only true church: the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. You know, the one that teaches love and tolerance toward all. (Its code name is "Zion" in the Book of Mormon.)
The Lord God hath given a commandment that all men should have charity, which charity is love, and except they should have charity they were nothing. 
But the laborer in Zion shall labor for Zion; for if they labor for money they shall perish.
For ... the Lord ... denieth none that come unto him, black and white, bond and free, male and female; and he remembereth the heathen; and all are alike unto God, both Jew and Gentile. 2 Nephi 26:30-33

13 May 2012

Some Bible verses for Mother's Day

It's not easy to find a good Bible verse for Mother's Day.
But here are the best I can find.

From the book of Hosea.
Plead with your mother, plead: ... let her ... put away her whoredoms ... and her adulteries from between her breasts;  Lest I strip her naked ... and slay her with thirst.  
And I will not have mercy upon her children; for they be the children of whoredoms. ...For their mother hath played the harlot.
Now will I discover her lewdness in the sight of her lovers, and none shall deliver her out of mine hand. Hosea 2:2-10
Give them, O LORD: what wilt thou give? give them a miscarrying womb and dry breasts. ... I will love them no more.  ... Yea, though they bring forth, yet will I slay even the beloved fruit of their womb. Hosea 9:14-16
 Their infants shall be dashed in pieces, and their women with child shall be ripped up. Hosea 13:16
And Deuteronomy.
The tender and delicate woman among you ... her eye shall be evil ... toward her son, and toward her daughter, And toward her young one that cometh out from between her feet, and toward her children which she shall bear: for she shall eat them. Deuteronomy 28:56-57

Or how about the inspiring words of Jesus?
I am come to set ... the daughter against her mother. ... He that loveth ... mother more than me is not worthy of me.  Matthew 10:35-37
Blessed is the womb that bare thee, and the paps which thou hast sucked. But he said, Yea rather, blessed are they that hear the word of God, and keep it.  Luke 11:27-28 
If any man come to me, and hate not his ... mother ... he cannot be my disciple. Luke 14:26 
Behold, thy mother ... seek(s) for thee. And he answered them, saying, Who is my mother? Mark 3:32-33
Woman, what have I to do with thee? (Jesus talking to his mother)   John 2:4
Any of these would look nice on a Mother's Day card, don't you think?

Happy Mother's Day!

11 May 2012

What the Bible says about Homosexuality

Homosexuality is an abomination to God (like shrimp).

Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination. Leviticus 18:22

Except that unlike eating shrimp, the punishment for homosexuality is death.

If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them. Leviticus 20:13

Or exile.

Asa did that which was right in the eyes of the LORD ... And he took away the sodomites out of the land. ... Asa's heart was perfect with the LORD all his days. 1 Kings 15:11-14

Jehoshaphat ... walked in all the ways of Asa his father ... doing that which was right in the eyes of the LORD ... The remnant of the sodomites, which remained in the days of his father Asa, he took out of the land. 1 Kings 22:42-46

And the New Testament is just as intolerant toward homosexuals.

For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature. And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman burned in their lust one toward another; men with men working that which is unseemly, and receiving in themselves that recompence of their error which was meet. (God will make you gay!) Romans 1:26-27

God gave them over to a reprobate mind ... without natural affection ... they which commit such things are worthy of death, not only do the same, but have pleasure in them that do them. Romans 1:28-32

The unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom ... neither fornicators ... nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind ... shall inherit the kingdom of God. 1 Corinthians 6:9-10

Knowing this, that the law is not made for a righteous man, but for ... them that defile themselves with mankind ... and if there be any other thing that is contrary to sound doctrine ... These filthy dreamers defile the flesh. 1 Timothy 1:9-10

Even as Sodom and Gomorrha ... giving themselves over to fornication, and going after strange flesh ... suffering the vengeance of eternal fire. Jude 7-8

Except for Jesus (who hung out with 12 guys and never said anything bad about homosexuality) who said that  you can increase your chances of being raptured by being gay. (So pray to be gay!)

I tell you, in that night there shall be two men in one bed; the one shall be taken, and the other shall be left. Two women shall be grinding together; the one shall be taken, and the other left. Luke 17:34-35

And finally, rejoice and be glad when you see homosexuals (lead about by silly, lusty, educated women), because then you'll know for sure that Jesus is coming soon.

In the last days ... men shall be ... without natural affection ... lovers of pleasures ... lead captive silly women laden with sins, led away with divers lusts, ... ever learning. 2 Timothy 3:1-7

09 May 2012

2 Nephi 25: Nephi speaks (somewhat) plainly about Jews, Jesus, and Joseph Smith

Nephi finally gives us a break from quoting Isaiah (2 Nephi 11-24) and begins to speak (somewhat) about the the 13 chapters he copied from the King James Version of the Bible (about 2200 years before that translation existed).
Now I, Nephi, do speak somewhat concerning the words which I have written, which have been spoken by the mouth of Isaiah. 2 Nephi 25:1
First he tells us about Jews.
The Jews ... works were works of darkness, and their doings were doings of abominations. 2 Nephi 25:2
Then he explains why no one understands Isaiah.  To understand Isaiah properly, you need to delight in plainness and be filled with the spirit of prophecy. And Nephi is full of prophecy and plainness.
The words of Isaiah are not plain unto you, nevertheless they are plain unto all those that are filled with the spirit of prophecy ... My soul delighteth in plainness unto my people. 2 Nephi 25:4
But Nephi's soul delights in more than just plainness; it also delights in the words of Isaiah. (That's probably why he included 13 consecutive chapters from Isaiah. See 2 Nephi 11-24)
My soul delighteth in the words of Isaiah. 2 Nephi 25:5a
The only people that understand the prophets are people that are taught after the manner of the Jews (like early 19th century Americans.)
The Jews do understand the things of the prophets, and there is none other people that understand the things which were spoken unto the Jews like unto them, save it be that they are taught after the manner of the things of the Jews. 2 Nephi 25:5b
And lucky for us, Nephi is from Jerusalem and knows all about all things such as and suchlike.
 But behold, I, Nephi ... have dwelt at Jerusalem, wherefore I know concerning the regions round about. 2 Nephi 25:6
With his prophecy credentials intact, Nephi proceeds with his own prophecy according to his plainness.
Behold, I proceed with mine own prophecy, according to my plainness. 2 Nephi 25:7
He starts by telling us a bit more about Jews. God has destroyed them from one generation to the next because of their iniquities.
As one generation hath been destroyed among the Jews because of iniquity, even so have they been destroyed from generation to generation according to their iniquities. 2 Nephi 25:9
Nephi prophesies that in another 600 years or so, the evil Jews will reject and crucify Jesus because of their hard hearts and stiff necks.
The Father of heaven and of earth, shall manifest himself unto them in the flesh, behold, they will reject him, because of their iniquities, and the hardness of their hearts, and the stiffness of their necks ... They will crucify him. 2 Nephi 25:12-13
And woe unto whoever fights against God's church (the Mormons), which will show up in another 2400 years or so.
 Wo unto them that fight against God and the people of his church. 2 Nephi 25:14
And, of course, woe unto the the Jews. They'll be scattered among all nations and be scourged by God for many generations until, finally, they are persuaded to believe in Christ.
Wherefore, the Jews shall be scattered among all nations. ... After they have been scattered, and the Lord God hath scourged them by other nations for ... many generations ... they shall be persuaded to believe in Christ. 2 Nephi 25:15-16
Meanwhile, God will inspire Joseph Smith to write find and translate the Book of Mormon, which is, as I'm sure you've noticed by now, a marvelous work and a wonder. ("A Marvelous work and a wonder" is LDS-speak for the Book of Mormon.)
The Lord ... will proceed to do a marvelous work and a wonder. 2 Nephi 25:17
That the promise may be fulfilled unto Joseph [Smith], that his seed should never perish as long as the earth should stand." 2 Nephi 25:21
And now Nephi gets precise about his Christ prophecy: Jesus Christ, the Son of God, will be born 600 years after Nephi's dad (Lehi) left Jerusalem.
According to the words of the prophets, the Messiah cometh in six hundred years from the time that my father left Jerusalem ... his name shall be Jesus Christ, the Son of God. 2 Nephi 25:19
Nephi reminds us about some of the plain and wonderful things that are found in the Hebrew scriptures:  the fiery serpents (Num. 21:6-9) and the water-bearing rock (Ex.17:6, Num.20:11)..
I have spoken plainly that ... the Lord God ... gave unto Moses power that he should heal the nations after they had been bitten by the poisonous serpents, if they would cast their eyes unto the serpent which he did raise up before them, and also gave him power that he should smite the rock and the water should come forth. 2 Nephi 25:20
And the rest of his prophecy is all about Jesus H. Christ. There's no other name that can get you saved.
There is none other name given under heaven save it be this Jesus Christ, of which I have spoken, whereby man can be saved. 2 Nephi 25:20
So believe in Christ.
We labor diligently to write, to persuade our children, and also our brethren, to believe in Christ. 2 Nephi 25:23
We believe in Christ. 2 Nephi 25:24a 
Look forward to Christ.
Look forward with steadfastness unto Christ. 2 Nephi 25:24b 
Be alive in Christ.
We are made alive in Christ because of our faith. 2 Nephi 25:25a
Talk of Christ.
We talk of Christ.  2 Nephi 25:26b
Rejoice in Christ.
We rejoice in Christ.  2 Nephi 25:26c
Preach of Christ.
We preach of Christ.  2 Nephi 25:26d
Prophesy of Christ.
We prophesy of Christ. 2 Nephi 25:26e
The Nephites did all these Christian things six centuries before Christianity existed.

So don't let anyone tell you Mormons aren't Christians.

03 May 2012

Jon Stewart's only fear: Religion

Jon Stewart isn't afraid to criticize people for their nasty beliefs -- unless the source of those beliefs is religion. Then, whatever it is, it's OK with him.

Here's how he put it on last night's show:
You can't cherry pick the worst aspects of a religion and then hold every member of that religion solely responsible for it. 
Yes, you can. That is exactly what we should do.

We should hold Mormons responsible for the racism that is found throughout the Book of Mormon; Jews, for the cruel and intolerant passages in the Hebrew Scriptures; Christians, for the nasty bullshit in both of their testaments; and Muslims, for the entire hodgepodge of hateful horseshit that is the Quran.

The individual members of a religion are not solely responsible for the worst aspects of their religion. But they are responsible for believing it.

And we should hold them responsible for every rotten cherry on their religion's tree. If they don't like the cherries, they should pick another tree.

Here's the Daily Show video.

01 May 2012

Dan Savage is right about the Bible: It's Bullshit

A couple weeks ago, Dan Savage discussed the Bible with a group of journalism students.

Here is what he said (see video below) -- along with some of the bullshit from the Bible that believers ignore while pretending to believe it.

The Bible, we’ll just talk about the Bible for a second. People often point out that they can’t help it – they can’t help with the anti-gay bullying, because it says right there in Leviticus, it says right there in Timothy, it says right there in Romans, that being gay is wrong.
Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination. Leviticus 18:22
If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them. Leviticus 20:13 
The law is not made for a righteous man, but for the lawless and disobedient, for the ungodly and for sinners, for unholy and profane, for murderers of fathers and murderers of mothers, for manslayers, For whoremongers, for them that defile themselves with mankind.... 1 Timothy 1:9-10
 In the last days ... men will be ... without natural affection. 2 Timothy 3:1-3
 For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature:  And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another ... God gave them over to a reprobate mind ... they which commit such things are worthy of death. Romans 1:26-32
We can learn to ignore the bullshit in the Bible about gay people. [applause] The same way, the same way we have learned to ignore the bullshit in the Bible about shellfish,
And all that have not fins and scales in the seas ... shall be an abomination unto you: ... Whatsoever hath no fins nor scales in the waters, that shall be an abomination unto you. Leviticus 11:10-11
 about slavery, 
Of the children of the strangers that do sojourn among you, of them shall ye buy, and of their families that are with you ... they shall be your possession. And ye shall take them as an inheritance for your children after you, to inherit them for a possession; they shall be your bondmen for ever.  Leviticus 25:44-46
If a man smite his servant, or his maid, with a rod, and ... he continue a day or two, he shall not be punished: for he is his money. Exodus 21:20-21
Servants [slaves], be subject to your masters with all fear; not only to the good and gentle, but also to the froward. 1 Peter 2:18
(See here for more bullshit from the Bible on slavery.)
about dinner, 
These shall ye not eat ... swine ... it is unclean unto you. Deuteronomy 14:7-8
It is good neither to eat flesh, nor to drink wine, nor any thing whereby thy brother stumbleth, or is offended, or is made weak. Romans 14:21
And thou shalt eat it as barley cakes, and thou shalt bake it with dung that cometh out of man. Ezekiel 4:12
about farming,
Thou shalt not plow with an ox and an ass together.  Deuteronomy 22:10
about menstruation, 
If a woman have an issue, and her issue in her flesh be blood, she shall be put apart seven days: and whosoever toucheth her shall be unclean until the even. And every thing that she lieth upon in her separation shall be unclean: every thing also that she sitteth upon shall be unclean. And whosoever toucheth her bed shall wash his clothes, and bathe himself in water, and be unclean until the even. And whosoever toucheth any thing that she sat upon shall wash his clothes, and bathe himself in water, and be unclean until the even. And if it be on her bed, or on any thing whereon she sitteth, when he toucheth it, he shall be unclean until the even. And if any man lie with her at all, and her flowers be upon him, he shall be unclean seven days; and all the bed whereon he lieth shall be unclean. And if a woman have an issue of her blood many days out of the time of her separation, or if it run beyond the time of her separation; all the days of the issue of her uncleanness shall be as the days of her separation: she shall be unclean. Every bed whereon she lieth all the days of her issue shall be unto her as the bed of her separation: and whatsoever she sitteth upon shall be unclean, as the uncleanness of her separation. And whosoever toucheth those things shall be unclean, and shall wash his clothes, and bathe himself in water, and be unclean until the even. But if she be cleansed of her issue, then she shall number to herself seven days, and after that she shall be clean. And on the eighth day she shall take unto her two turtles, or two young pigeons, and bring them unto the priest, to the door of the tabernacle of the congregation. And the priest shall offer the one for a sin offering, and the other for a burnt offering; and the priest shall make an atonement for her before the LORD for the issue of her uncleanness. Leviticus 15:19-30
If a man be just, and do that which is lawful and right, and hath not ... come near to a menstruous woman..... Ezekiel 18:5-6
about virginity, 
If a man find a damsel that is a virgin, which is not betrothed, and lay hold on her, and lie with her, and they be found; Then the man that lay with her shall give unto the damsel's father fifty shekels of silver, and she shall be his wife. Deuteronomy 22:28-29
Then shall the kingdom of heaven be likened unto ten virgins, which took their lamps, and went forth to meet the bridegroom. Matthew 25:1
about masturbation. 
And Onan knew that the seed should not be his; and it came to pass, when he went in unto his brother's wife, that he spilled it on the ground, lest that he should give seed to his brother. And the thing which he did displeased the LORD: wherefore he slew him also. Genesis 38:9-10
If any man's seed of copulation go out from him, then he shall ... be unclean. Leviticus 15:16
Whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart. And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell. And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell. Matthew 5:28-30
We ignore bullshit in the Bible about all sorts of things. The Bible is a radically pro-slavery document. Slave owners waved Bibles over their heads during the Civil War and justified it. The shortest book in the New Testament is a letter from Paul to a Christian slave owner about owning his Christian slave. 
Philemon: This short letter was written by Paul to his slave-owner friend and fellow believer, Philemon. Paul was writing about Onesimus, who he had recently converted, and who happened to also be a runaway slave belonging to Philemon. Since Paul was in a position of authority among believers, this would have been a great opportunity for him (and God) to condemn slavery -- if he (and God) had anything against it, that is. But apparently he didn't. Instead he returned the slave to his owner without so much as a word against the institution of slavery. 
(Note: Philemon isn't quite "the shortest book in the New Testament" -- 2 and 3 John are a bit shorter.) 
And Paul doesn’t say “Christians don’t own people.” Paul talks about how Christians own people.

We ignore what the Bible says about slavery, because the Bible got slavery wrong. Tim — ah, Sam Harris, in A Letter To A Christian Nation, points out that the Bible got the easiest moral question that humanity has ever faced wrong. Slavery! What’re the odds that the Bible got something as complicated as human sexuality wrong? 100% percent.

The Bible says that if your daughter’s not a virgin on her wedding night – if a woman isn’t a virgin on her wedding night, she shall be dragged to her father’s doorstep and stoned to death. 
If any man take a wife, and go in unto her, and hate her ... And say, I took this woman, and when I came to her, I found her not a maid: Then shall the father of the damsel, and her mother, take and bring forth the tokens of the damsel's virginity unto the elders of the city in the gate: And ... say ... these are the tokens of my daughter's virginity. ... But if ... the tokens of virginity be not found for the damsel, then they shall bring out the damsel to the door of her father's house, and the men of her city shall stone her with stones that she die. Deuteronomy 22:13-17
Callista Gingrich lives. [applause] And there is no effort to amend state constitutions to make it legal to stone women to death on their wedding night if they’re not virgins. At least not yet. We don’t know where the GOP is going these days. [audience laughs]

People are dying because people can’t clear this one last hurdle. They can’t get past this one last thing in the Bible about homosexuality.

One other thing I wanna talk about is — [chuckles] — so, you can tell the Bible guys in the hall that they can come back now, because I’m done beating up the Bible. [applause]

It’s funny, as someone who’s on the receiving end of beatings that are justified by the Bible, how pansy-assed some people react when you push back. [applause]

And here's a great video on the subject by Zinnia Jones.